Need #3. Respect: "Treat Me Like a Real Person"
Ever feel like you're negotiating with a tiny lawyer? That's respect at play. Middle schoolers crave it because they're starting to see themselves as capable individuals, not just "kids." This need fuels pushback against rules or sarcasm when they feel dismissed or talked ‘down to’, as they're learning to assert themselves in a world that still treats them like little ones.
The silver lining? Respect is a two-way street that teaches empathy and communication—skills they'll need through their 20s.
Respond by modeling it: Acknowledge their opinions with phrases like, "I hear you. We’ve chosen to do things this way because .... Do you have another suggestion?” It's not about giving in; it's about building trust. And hey, if they roll their eyes, just chuckle and say, "Been there, done that—now pass the snacks." We're in this together!
PG tip: Make an effort to ask for their thoughts and opinions on things, and really listen. This helps them feel valued, meeting you on a more adult level.
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